Where Mute Memories Start Talking

If you know me and you’re reading this, then you’re currently laughing at me whilst knowing me and reading this. Santa Barbara isn’t exactly known for being one of the chilly places of the world (like Antarctica, for example), but it really does get quite cold here on occassion. By “on occassion,” I mean every single blasted evening. The nighttime lows are usually in the 35-45 range, so consider that before you get all frisky and start to put together a sentence which uses the words “idiot, live, beach, warm, etc.”

The trek to Carrillo usually consists of me throwing on jeans and a hoodie while everyone else walks on over with shorts and a t-shirt. Cold never used to bother me. I must be getting old. I wish I had more body fat. Maybe I should start eating more of the imitation-chicken rice bowls.

I actually don’t mind the cafeteria food that much, to be honest. I really like the stir fry, which varies at a reasonable rate. It seemed better first quarter, though. They never had to substitute turkey for beef/chicken back then. The local cows and hens are probably freezing to death.

Turkeys are starting to anger me now. I see turkeys in places where no turkey should be (see: Carrillo Dining Commons stir-fry). This was the deli line-up last week:

M: Turkey
T: Turkey Ham
W: Turkey Pastrami
R: Turkey Salami
F: Turkey

Mitch Hedberg put it best:
“Come on all you turkeys. Just…..be yourself!”

Something you may have been confused by: “R” stands for “Thursday” in all college-related schedules, since the word Thursday begins with the letter R.

Last R, one of the girls in my hall was eating some UCSB chocolate chip cake. I noticed that she was leaving the bottom crust for some reason. I think it’s the best part, since its covered with fudge. Evidently some other people noticed too, since this girl soon found herself explaining that the bottom half had too many calories. Maybe someone should have told her that the four beers she had the night before contained about 300 calories each. The smoking probably wasn’t good either, but whatever- it was only hookah. This same girl was on the floor of my room the week before, holding a random bicycle tire. Good source of entertainment : )

Hunger is starting to set in, so naturally I’m attacking a bag of mini-Crunch Bars right now. Nothing better than a little chocolate at 11:11 PM. Time to make a wish, too. I should tell everyone in the hall about the 11:11 rule. None of them will know anything about it. Almost everyone is on the secular side here, along with the liberal side. Not exactly the most friendly environment for a conservative Catholic. More on that on a later date. Maybe.

Phew. One down. Hopefully I’ll get a little better at this as time goes by.